Manner

'Manner (an etiquette a man needs to have)'

If you’re a man, I think that you shouldn’t act so sly like a fox and not lie. You need to know how to respect a woman and see the bigger picture in the world with a simple mindset. You need to know when to be strong to stronger opponents, but weak to weaker opponents as well.

#Bang Yongguk - B.A.P's Leader

Feel Tired

' Feel Tired'

26th March 2013

There a time when you felt like quitting from everything, when you start to give up and wants nothing anymore but away from anyone.

All of sudden, from start of the day till near midnight, I still feel miserable and stress over nothing. It's like nothing can make me happy anymore. But... why??

I thought of many things, I kept everything to myself and rarely told anyone including my family and best friend. When things got complicated, I ran away by busily doing my favorite therapy... watch korean or japanese drama for hours or take a long sleep away from anything.

It keeps me smiling and laughing over nothing. It helps me to feel I can still breath. It helps me to be me.

There's too much conditions that happened which make me feel weak and useless everyday. I can't even be confident anymore with myself because of my conditions. ( i can't say it here )

When I'm physically be me, laughing and smiling over nothing, mentally I'm ruining my thought with everything. It's become a habit and people tends to ask me, why I'm laughing?? what's so funny? but like always i will just shrugged and say, just because...

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I'm still surviving, even when i felt like I'm dying.

Everyday is a drama time!

'Everyday is a drama time!'

24th March 2013

Yup!! It's true... From the 1st day of my part-time promoter for fair till now, I get a chance to see a drama aired in front of me like a HD... Or should I say live?

They will tell a story about others, fighting and angry to someone, talk behind their backs, hating each other while smile in their faces, crying and fighting over the phone with beloved one, and much more.

Too much drama sometimes make me headache, confused, doesn't know who should I trust (which I decided to hear and not sided with anyone) , put my acting mask and eagerly listen to their whining and blaming towards each other.

I'm still new, and I stay only for 2 and half weeks there which mean whatever happened there won't lasted too long for me to watch and observe who is who they say they are.

They are a good people, but mistrust, misunderstanding, egoist, tempered, misjudge, and such make them fight with each other in a silent but brutal mode.

How could you told someone as new as me at my very 1st day that your very own colleague has a bad attitude? And every single day you will remind me to see how bad their colleague is doing that time? How you being could too prejudice with that person just because of his mistakes?

I'm a very simple minded person, sometimes I don't see whets the big problem of that drama. It can end faster if they give and take, confront their hatred together instead of giving too much negative aura at the floor.

But, without that drama, I'll become too bored to work, dull, and not much to listen about. Well, I'm a very great listener, since they got too much info they want to tell me, in order for me to understand their current drama episode of the day.

They might work with each other for a long time, but how can you work with thinking that you hate their attitude every day? Talk behind their backs about their mistake but keep your mouth shut and smile when in front of them? Bring out others mistake to everyone exclude them only make things worse, where your professionalism when you need it? You’re working not to make enemy...

Don't burden yourself with too much melodramatic drama... you just make yourself an actor for the rest to watch it through HD.

I'm in frustrated stage

'I'm in frustrated stage'

Things out of control again... 1st day and i alreasy loss. I got briefing for tomorrow fair, for part time promoter. And everything become confused. What i've planned for today ruined... And i'm not in the mood anymore... I can't smile... I can't put my positive attitude in my mind. I will definitely wasted my 4 hours doing nothing and waiting...

If not because of i need money... I won't be here now.. After all that happened today... I want to run from humiliation... From this shit...

I hate myself!! For give up that easily... Thats why i try to comfort myself... And think everything wil be fine this time... I need money urgently... And this is the fastest i can get...

My mind in complicated stage now, with my kitten is injured and no one to bring me to the clinic... But myself, still stuck and doesn't know when the exact time for my briefing to finish later this afternoon, and whether i can bring myself home in time and go to the clinic in time too...

Wish It was you

'Wish it was you'

I won't say much... just think this mv suit the photo perfectly. If you wondering why I said it? Listen and see the lyrics *wink*wink* and feel free to watch the drama^^

#Flower Boy Next Door

Put yourself in their lives

'Put yourself in their lives'

Don't make your own assumption towards others. They have their own lives and reasons for everything that happened to them. Don't blame and give negative feedback just because you saw their attitude, how they lives, and how unworthy they are in your eyes.

People have their own story whether it is good or bad.  They adapt from that environment and changed their mind thinking, attitude towards others to shield their selves from getting hurt or from open up to others.

Put yourself in their lives... know their conditions, their hatred, their perspectives before judge them negatively. What you saw and know about them not the same with what they have to dealt in their lives. For some, maybe what happened to them isn't difficult, but to others, especially to them, they can't run away, can't dealt with it as strong as you think you can be.

Not everyone in this world can have a happy lives, some have worst, some more worst than the others, but some... you can't even imagine what they have to dealt in their lives to stay alive. 

When you think your lives is worst enough, remember that yours not worst enough compare to others.

Promises? Heh!

'Promises? Heh!'

One of the things that I hated the most is a promise... Heck! Don't you ever dare to make any promise if you can't fulfill it...

When I heard someone make a promise with me... I have an urged to smack their head and let them eat back their words... But yeah! Out of courtesy... I just told them not to.

If you can't keep you’re promised, why make one? How much promises that you want to pour to your beloved one before you can actually do it?

You only gave them hope and you definitely disappointed them. Do you think those promises doesn't hurt? It hurt... To know you make a promise but will never fulfilled it... Yeah! It hurt; even they never said anything about it.

Rather than make a promise... Why not you show them what you capable of? It's much better. 

Whoever you made your promises believes and hoping that one day you would actually made it happened. But when they realized that nothing come out from your mouth is true, they won't give a damn about what you said anymore...

Don't put too much sugar in your mouth... It just comes out as salt to others...